im aiming for the “shes a badass and cute as hell but I wouldn’t touch her without asking” look

(Source: reifaun, via sextn0ise)


I found out I have a kink for my bf speaking German to me and the best part is I don’t know what he’s saying so yesterday I almost came to him saying he cycled here very fast on his green bicycle

(via teenscoolest)



a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

what the fuck

(via drugs4cats)